English for runaways

Es ist angedeutet worden das ich kein deutscher bin.

Stimmt!:D

Ich habe meistens gar keine probleme damit, nur wenn mein rotwein glas lehr ist!

Um allen ein bissel hilfe zu leisten, werde ich hier, mal hin und wieder, was rein posten in english damit ihr auch was zum üben haben.

Okay boys and girls, and those in between, heres the first one:

Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to a call. The house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-year-old girl, to hold a flashlight high over her Mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby. Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked.

Heidi, the mother, pushed and pushed, and after a little while Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom. Connor began to cry. The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-year old what she thought about what she had just witnessed. Kathleen quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place......... smack his ass again!"

Zitat von gina-ginelli

*lol*

Aber wo wir schon dabei sind- wie würdest Du "how up do high knee" übersetzen?

Und was sagt Dir der Spruch "was Krupp in Essen, sind wir in trinken" ?

Alles anzeigen

Redewendungen...............................

Die sind verdammt schwer!:D

Wofür wird der erste gebraucht? Der 2. denke ich ist einer redewendung.

Next one!

Three women were all pregnant at the same time so they all carpooled to their first doctor’s appointment. On the way there one woman said, " I was on bottom during s*x so I will have a boy". The second one said, "Well, I was on top during s*x so I will have a girl". The third girl started to cry and said, " Oh my goodness, I’m having Puppies".

Zitat von Schteffan

WAS????? pueppies? :p

Jetzt bis du dran. Ich war das nicht!

Next one!

Birds and Bees

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in.

“Mother, where do babies come from?”

The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug and have s*x.”

The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend.

“Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?”

“Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”

And if you read that without thinking of the names belonging to anyone, then it fits in just about every workplace!:D

And another one..............

Last Saturday morning Bob got up early, put on his long johns and dressed quietly. He made a lunch, grabbed the dog and went to the garage to hook up the boat to the truck and down the driveway he went.

Backing out of the garage he discovered rain is pouring down; it is like a torrential downpour. There is snow mixed in with the rain and the wind is blowing 50 mph. Minutes later, Bob pulled back into the garage.

He came back into the house and turned the TV to the weather channel. He found it’s going to be bad weather all day long, so he put the boat back in the garage, quietly undressed and slipped back into bed.

There, Bob cuddled up to his wife’s back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."

To which his wife sleepily replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"